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Joined 7M ago
Cake day: Dec 03, 2021


Another part of servicing pinball machines is the artwork and the playfield. You generally want to restore or stabilize that before doing too much in-game testing. And you certainly want to replace the ball if it needs it. A rusty ball can damage the playfield.

With cosmetic work, you often have brave decisions to make. One of the keys is to make it look like you haven’t done anything to it. If you must err on touching up the paint, you generally want to go darker. You can use clear coat paint to seal the paint. Working with water-soluble paints tends to be good, but you need to seal the paint.

Decals and mylar can be tricky. Deciding to remove mylar is brave and tricky. You can’t really paint on top of it, and removing it usually destroys the underlying paint. If you want to leave it, it kinda makes it hard to match nearby paint, since you are stuck trying to make the paint look dirty.

Now, decals on plastic parts like ball tubes are not as bad. You can likely find replicas of the decals. In that case, gently clean the plastic parts and apply new decals.

Servicing pinball and arcade machines
I've watched videos of Ronnie Lyons in South Carolina fixing old pinball and arcade games. The latest video has a pinball machine that is 65 years old. It was from the time period that they were still using wooden side rails, and a cigarette holder came as standard equipment. There are some repair techniques that are common to all of these machines. Cleaning all electrical contacts and plugs applies to all of them. Often, that fixes the majority of the issues right there. From there, one would want to check all the voltages and see that the correct size fuses are used. If they are too small, they will likely just blow, and if they are too large, that can lead to catastrophic failure in the event of a problem. If there are large capacitors, and they are original, you most likely want to change those. Sometimes, you want to go even larger with high-value power filtering capacitors, such as when the cabinet and playfield lights flicker when you do something on the playfield. With solid-state pinball machines and arcade games, you may need to rebuild the power boards. It is best with most of these machines to work your way in from the power cord. Rebuilding the power boards isn't too hard. Just test all the semiconductors and change what is broken, change the capacitors on the board, reflow the sockets, and replace the connectors if necessary. Sometimes you run into parts availability problems. For a number of the power boards, there is room for larger rectifiers on the other side. If you can't find the 3-5 amp rectifiers, you may have to use 30 amp replacements, so you'd have to mount those on the other side of the board, and you likely won't need to add any heat sinks. In some cases, you will have regulators putting out too much power. In some cases, that is a design flaw or from using a different part than what was called for. Sometimes, you can jumper over the nearby resistor to reduce the voltage. There is also a pot to adjust the high voltage output line. While that should be around 190 volts for the plasma displays, you may want to use a little less to help save the displays (they don't make them anymore). On the power feeding the MPU board, you don't want that to be much over 5 volts. If it is 5.2 volts, that is one thing, since there is voltage loss in the wiring, but if it is putting out 5.6 volts or more, that can be a problem. If that is too high, it can damage the MPU board or other boards such as the sound board. There are 2 categories of pinball machines, electromagnetic and sold-state. The EM machines use motors and relays for everything. Most of the problems on those are related to bad connections or misadjusted switches/relays, though you will find broken parts on occasion. You don't want to adjust every switch, just the ones that are obviously messed up and those tested as not working. There are parts that routinely wear out such as the plunger tip, the rubber rings, the flipper shoes, etc. There is a scoring motor on the EM machines. On rare occasions, the cam will break where it attaches to the motor. That will be a problem since you can't get the cam anymore. If you run into that, you will need to hack a solution. There are stepping units that should be disassembled, cleaned, and lubricated. The same goes with the score reels. On solid-state machines, you may run into PCB trouble. If you have major issues, you should check the playfield for problems before reinstalling and attempting to use any boards that you repair. For instance, if a solenoid and a switch are touching or miswired, that can send solenoid voltage up digital lines and possibly damage the MCU board. That is why most who repair the boards don't like to do so without having the entire machine. (Similar goes for automatic transmission repair. They want your vehicle so they can clean any debris from the transmission cooler under the radiator so it won't damage the new or rebuilt transmission.) Some problems manifest in multiple places, and you have to be aware of that. For instance, solenoids and transistors often fail together. Either the transistor shorted first and caused the coil to lock on and short from overheating, or a shorted coil damaged the transistor driving it. Sometimes, that is caused by a misadjusted switch. There are 2 coils inside the flipper solenoids. A normally closed switch shorts the finer coil to give more power so the flipper will move rapidly. Once the flipper is fully extended, the switch is supposed to open and reduce the power used as the flipper is held in place. If a flipper is weak, it could be that the end-of-stroke switch is misadjusted or dirty, or in some cases, particularly with the EM machines, the control contacts (the flipper switches) are dirty/worn. On bulbs, it is a good idea to change all the bulbs at once. You really don't want to tear back into the machine anytime soon when the others blow. If they use #44 bulbs, you may do better to replace them all with #46 bulbs. They are slightly dimmer, operate cooler, and use less power. That help reduce melting parts on the playfield, and with solid-state machines, that can help the driver transistors last longer. If there are still bulbs that don't work, the next place to check would be the sockets themselves. You can often wiggle the bulb or rotate the socket where it is riveted if that is the case. If you still have bulbs that are out, then check the switches that are driving them (on an EM machine), or check the light driver board on a solid-state machine. The first thing to do if you suspect the light board is to inspect the plugs. Replace the connectors if you need to. Then make sure the connectors have good solder connections. So reheat all the solder joints to the connectors. Then test all the transistors, particularly the ones that schematics suggest are involved, replacing them as needed. Now, if a whole group of lights is involved, you sometimes need to change the chips feeding the transistors. On plasma displays. If they are not working or have weird issues, there are several things to try. Inspect the "glass" part. If there is a hole, signs of a leak, or burned digits, there is no way to fix the display. Just keep the board for parts. If there is no obvious problems, then check the components. Check the transistors and the values of the resistors. Once you change those driving the digits involved, it may be the IC if it still doesn't work. Of course, if none of the displays work, it could be a problem on the MPU board, or rarely, all the displays are indeed bad. If you cannot fix the displays, there are luckily some LED retrofit kits. Depending on the machine and the upgrade kit, you may be able to change just the affected displays or maybe not. If you must change them all, you can remove the fuse to the 190v power rail, since you won't need it. If you upgrade the displays to LED ones, certainly keep the plasma displays, particularly the working ones, since you may need them for another machine. On arcade monitors, if they don't come up, you should rebuild the deflection and high voltage boards. Clean and reflow the connectors as with everything else. Change all the capacitors if they don't appear to have been changed. Check the fuses and semiconductors, replace what's needed, and install the correct fuse values. For some machines, if you change the capacitors, then you should also change the flyback transformer if the original is still installed. They may have cracks or other issues, and restoring the original voltages may damage them. So on the machines known to have this issue, replace the flyback when you rebuild it. If you find that your display changes size after the monitor warms up, that is likely the high voltage rectifier. If you have unusual color shifts, that could be short in the CRT. In that case, change the CRT if you can find one. There are also some hacks that some try such as building a power supply just for the filament to mitigate the short. But then, things are not original. For the MPU board (in either arcade or pinball machines), besides cleaning and reflowing the connectors, you should lift all the socketed chips out, clean them, then reseat them. If the machine's self-test shows that the RAM is bad, that is not necessarily the problem. It could be, or it could be the nearby buffer chip. A logic probe is mostly what you'd need for troubleshooting. Another place to check is the CPU watchdog circuit. Sometimes a nearby buffer may be bad, and occasionally, a sound chip if one is located near the CPU. With sound boards, you should do the usual work such as cleaning and reflowing connectors and cleaning and resocketing any socketed chips. If you are missing certain sounds, you may want to try swapping any POKEY chips. Sometimes a logic gate or an opamp may be bad. Just follow the schematics to where the missing sounds are produced.

I haven’t read that yet, but yeah, child sacrifices tend to be the work of dark entities.

On trans, I divide it into 2 categories, transsexuals and transgender. Transsexuals just want to get the surgery and move on. Transgender tend to keep their original anatomy for life, and I consider them the most toxic and damaging to society.

In some cases, IMHO, one should hold trans-identified children (and spouses for that matter) to what they say they are. I mean, if you try to nag, counsel, forbid, etc., you only make them hate you and rebel against you. When it comes to emotions, they need to be dealt with experientially. So if a boy is insistent about being a girl, raise him as one, and construct it to where things are hard and realistic. “I don’t want to wear that dress, it’s ugly!” “You will, and if you keep on, I will give you something to cry about.” Or, “I want to play sports with the boys.” “Actually, I need you to help me in the kitchen. If we get things done soon enough, then you can go out and play. And don’t get your pretty dress dirty, or you’re going to have to clean it!” So the result would be forcing them to engage their mind and weigh out their options. Just don’t give them a fantasy version. So if they can’t take the pressure, they will rebel away from what they are doing. “Mom, I didn’t know it was so hard to be a girl. I’m not doing it anymore!”

A simpler version of the above is what a television repairman did. His son came home with an earring. That night, the dad kissed his son on the mouth and said, “Goodnight Princess!” The next day, the earring was gone. The last I heard was that his son was in the Navy, maybe working on a nuclear submarine.

And yes, I think gays tend to have a distorted sense of friendships and boundaries and confuse sex with friendship. I think they tend to have an underdeveloped/immature sense of relationships, as well as shallow personalities. So bossing people around or trying to get sex all the time is normal to them. A lot should have some therapy done around topics like excessive religiosity, self-esteem, and assertiveness. I mention excessive religiosity as that can be a sign of the opposite. So you do right because you are scared of God and don’t have a personal relationship, and that can paradoxically drive someone into depravity. The longer you repress things or hold onto this duality, the worse it becomes later, since the longer you hold things back like that, the harder the rebellion will be. It is kinda like the laws of physics and the part about equal and opposite reactions. Assertiveness is another contributor because so many gay guys have domineering and controlling mothers who have emasculated their husbands. So gay guys often need coaching on how to cut the apron strings and be their own person.

As for common concerns in ex-gays, here are a few. If they want to become ex-gay out of a fear of hell, they should deal with that concern first. If you have flashbacks and images, such as seeing female genitals every time you close your eyes, then you should do some trauma work. Lesbians may have some additional concerns such as codependency (a pattern of self-denial and an addiction to “helping” others) and emotional enmeshment and may need therapy for those. They may also need to do trauma work, since a common issue that fuels lesbianism is domestic violence. So they “rebel” inside at an early age when they notice their father is the aggressor and their mother is a doormat who just takes it. So they may reason that it is better to be a man, and over time, they become more like a man in their personality. Then it may become self-fulfilling since they won’t be able to find a man who would desire them.

It is interesting that the Bible says to not let your sons be sodomites or your daughters be harlots. That is interesting to me due to a scientific theory that proposes a gay gene that causes promiscuity in women and homosexuality in men.

To me, it’s not a matter of telling others what to do with their bodies, but my right to express that a certain behavior is wrong. I think we need to exercise and fight for the right to do that much. “My lifestyle isn’t affecting you,” yeah, and me condemning your (not you) foul, immoral behavior isn’t affecting you. If it is, that is not my problem, but the fault of those who think that. If my words make you want to end your life, then you should see a therapist for that or reconsider your behavior. How are my words condemning a lifestyle in the abstract any worse than what you (those using the argument) do in the bedroom?

Like most here, I do believe that what gays have is not a marriage, and that they are appropriating a straight-only term. At least in modern years, they have become more honest and use terms like “same-sex marriage” and not “gay marriage.” Gays could always marry someone of the opposite sex just like everyone else. Nobody really other than the bride or her father would really object to a gay man marrying a straight woman. So same-sex marriage is more specific.

And yes, keep gay and trans away from the kids. Now if a kid is truly unhappy in their gender, then raise them as a girl and keep your mouth shut about it, and make the kid not talk about it either. I make a distinction between transsexual and transgender that many don’t make. There’s a huge difference between feeling trapped in the wrong body and having a fetish or doing it for attention. So I believe there are transsexual kids, but not transgender kids under the age of 12.

Well, I oppose gay sex and how it harms society. The biggest problem I have is how it enters the media, how it is normalized, how it is shoved down our throats, etc. I’m almost to the point of saying the government needs to round up the advocates and activists and jail them. If the rest can keep it to themselves, they should.

I believe gay folks can change or at least develop a durable holding pattern. I’m not advocating repression, but full knowledge of oneself and choosing not to do what is wrong. It has nothing to do with “mah feelings.” Screw feelings. Even the Bible says, “…such were some of ye.” We have people harming their souls, personalities, and interpersonal relations and don’t even know it. They claim to be brave, strong, and proud, yet lack the strength of mind to confront their aberrant desires.

A problem is that when artists/creaters are gay, it colors their entire work, and appreciating and normalizing the work also validates the thought processes to make it. There will be subconscious inclusions in their work, even if they don’t see it and most don’t notice it. Take the song, Bohemian Rhapsody. A lot of it seems more metaphoric for something else. Supposedly, his inspiration was from the Old West (US) and the idea that a cowboy killed someone over a woman. But you get the part about spitting in someone’s eye and leaving them to die. Well, Freddy Mercury was Persian by birth and raised into Zoroastrianism. In the Middle East, humiliating someone by spitting on them as they are put to death is mostly reserved for sex offenders and homosexuals. Why do that for a murder that was spurred on by heterosexuality? So apparently, Freddy knew some things about himself and it came out in his music. Even the part about killing a man, I can’t help but wonder if Freddy suspected he was HIV+ himself at that point. I mean, I can’t help but think up alternate lyrics like, “Mama, I killed a man, put my junk inside of him, gave him AIDS, and now he’s dead.” And why did he say, “pulled my trigger” and not “pulled the trigger?” A trigger is part of a gun, not something personal.

A person’s work and the subtleties they add also give clues to the origins of their behaviors. Isn’t it interesting there are a lot of gay programmers and trans engineers (at least ones who don’t fully buy trans inclusion with the LGB)? Lynn Conway is a transsexual and made at least two major contributions to computer hardware.

15/50 years. Ugh! “He was abused.” Many rapists/pedos were.

And? That makes me want to say what one hooker asked her client. “Where’s the rest of it?”

30/30 means 30 Mb/s in both directions. So 500/500 is 500 Mb/s in both directions. So in the process of figuring out why I had an outage, they somehow also fixed whatever issue that prevented me from getting upgraded to 500/500 like the other customers.

And POE is Path of Exile, a game. It shouldn’t have a 30 Gb game resources file. That’s just bad coding.

In some Hebrew traditions, the Holy Spirit is female. That makes sense in a way when you think about the unpardonable sin. I mean, try slapping your own mother and see what Dad does, assuming he is a real man.

I’ve been around. Nothing much has been happening in my communities. A few days back, I lost connection for a couple of days. That had a silver lining. When they came out to investigate, it turned out to be just corrupt settings on their end. They never came inside. The guy cleaned the IR transceiver piece, but other than that, it was on their end.

Sometime in the past, they did a complimentary upgrade for all their 30/30 customers and gave them 500/500. Well, I never got that. But after they reconfigured everything, I did. So not only did they get me back up and operating, I ended up with about 15 times the speed I had before. While Speedtest didn’t show 500/500, it showed 453/475 or something, which was still much faster. I could probably do some tweaking and show a little better. At least when POE or other games update, it won’t be as painful of a wait. A game’s resources should never be 30 Gb in size. Really, when programmers introduce that much bloat, a judge should sentence them to program on a 6502 or Z80 architecture for a year, or some other retro system.

If you’re that cucked to get the vax, you might as well cut your balls off and mail them to Pfizer.

As for the “they/them” stuff, that should only be allowed if they have Dissociative Disorder. Those are people who truly believe there are multiple people inside of them.

That is partly why I support actual transsexuals and not those merely pretending to be the other sex, and those pretending they are “other.”

This even harms actual transsexuals who work hard to assimilate into the other gender and who have a rugged identity of being the other gender from early in life.

Here is an example. Someone living as a woman was in court. They asked the judge to refer to them with female pronouns. A decade or 2 ago, that would have been seen as a reasonable request. But the judge said no, that it would set a bad precedent since then they’d have to refer to people with made-up pronouns by those too.

We need to bump this community up some
I might want to focus more over here. I've been helping out at Reddit in the homebrew computing sub there. TBH, I might want to focus on the other type of "homebrewing." I have a number of bags of brown sugar and some packs of yeast. I guess all I need now are some sterile containers. And to be honest, I should get a hardier yeast so I can get higher percentages. The more sugar you use, the hardier the yeast you need, or it will just turn out sweet. So you have to match the strength of your wort to the varieties of yeast you intend to use.

I still haven't found any relief from intrusive ruminations
I am about to the point where when God fails and doesn't love me enough to prevent them, I'm going to start calling these shortcomings of God out in public. There are shitty people behind bars who don't suffer this issue. In fact, many have no sense of conscience at all. They may be going to Hell, but at least they are going in bliss. I wonder if this is the "unknown problem" that Paul had. He took the thing to prayer 3 times and finally concluded that God wouldn't heal him and accepted that. I'm sorry, but I'm not that kind of pussy. He did many things for God, kept all the laws and traditions from his youth, and yet evil people didn't have that problem. And then I struggle with the concept of Jesus. So you are the highest God and decide to go off on a power trip and come up with a bunch of rules nobody can follow to have an excuse to set up your own flesh and blood to get murdered? And where I struggled is that God "loved" me enough to sacrifice his Son for me, but doesn't love me enough to stop the intrusive memories which I'm sure is easy for God. I can't say easier than the other, since if you are the sum total of everything, then relative terms cannot apply. I see EACH and EVERY intrusive memory as an act of hatred on God's part and tantamount to rape because I don't consent. My love for God is conditional, and while that is probably a character flaw, I'd be content to have it forever. I don't know how to get God to do a miracle here. I don't know how to twist God's arm, and some have succeeded in that. I am not saying that went well for them, but I can live with the consequences. Moses tried to force God's hand when the people were murmuring, and he lost some blessings over that. Some of the other fathers (and mothers) of faith did things to try to force God's hand. Like the prophecy that Esau would serve Jacob, and despite what his mom did to try to even the score, she ultimately played into God's will in that matter. So I don't care if some God murdered their son for me to get me into Heaven if I refuse to live with a God who doesn't love me enough to heal this problem permanently. Scumbags in prison don't have that issue. I'd almost want to trade places with them.

How to determine your mental illness
Just ask where your friends are: * Addicted: Your friends are passed out beside you. * Depressed: No friends. * Psychopath: Your friends are under your floor or cut up in your bathtub. * Schizo: Your friends are inside your walls.

A woman sees her doctor
A woman sees a doctor. He starts grabbing her boobs. He asks, "Do you know what I'm doing?" "Checking for lumps?" "Yes." Then he grabs her thighs. "Know what I'm doing?" "Looking for blood clots?" "Yes." Then he starts having sex with her. "Do you know what I'm doing?" "Yeah, you're getting the STD I came to see you about."

Let's move the God question up a notch
I am willing to permanently worship the first god to remove unwanted memories from me, replace ALL the FIRST opportunities to do things my way, myself, without help, in matters that don't inherently impact others, and replace my memories with the knowledge of getting to do EVERYTHING myself without help. And yes, I could care less about eternal life, my soul, or any of that crap. So let consequences be damned. As soon as I find a God who will remove ALL unwanted memories of unwanted help and who loves me enough to wind the clock back to give me the stolen opportunities back or at least manipulate my memories and conscience to where I remember ONLY doing EVERYTHING that I benefit from myself. I will worship THAT GOD and THAT GOD ONLY and permanently turn my back on ALL others. And having a life where I constantly get to struggle, earn everything good that happens to me and have no "privilege" unless I earned it (and without ANY benefit coming from my race, my family ties, my friend circle, or any sort of influence or previously existing wealth on my part).

If God doesn't kill me tonight, is there a God?
I've prayed for years for God to repair the brain injury that God raped my soul of by allowing it. I've prayed for years that God would stop worshiping the idols of everyone else's free will by letting others abuse me with their unwanted, forced help. Those rape-deserving, cop bullet deserving, sacks of shit arrogantly pretend that I am stupid crap who needs help as they do. I've prayed for God to remove the intrusive memories. However, God has NEVER loved me that much, and I could never love a God that has any filthy plan of me keeping them. However, God did "love" me so much as to make up a bunch of impossible rules out of some sick need and immoral desire to control everyone and to have some excuse to murder His son. --- So if I make it through the night, that will discredit the notion of there being a god. I just can't accept the concept of a God who enjoys the evil in the world enough to not intervene while sucking off the penis of "free will." "Rape another child for me, Epstein!" Unlike Paul, I will put God to the test. If I make it past the night, then I will consider that God is fake and made up and that Christianity was just garbage made up by Emperor Constantine. If God lets me live past tonight, then we must consider that it is just a weak little [gay slur] who is not to be feared, respected, or obeyed. And pray that this will happen. It is my will to perish tonight, and not by my own hands. So pray that I die and if I answer, you will have your answer on the God question. And if I don't answer, and I'm not going to be a troll about that, you have my word, then you have your answer. And if there is no way for me to get back in a timely fashion (power or Net outage), then I will get back when I can.

What is ethical revenge?
Obviously, for Christians, revenge is not something to seek. But folks will seek it. Here are some things I think are pointers to keep in mind. 1. Don't target animals or children. If a dog barks all night or craps in your yard, that is its owner's fault. Similar is true with children. They have parents. So don't kick the dog over them crapping in your yard. No, mail the dog's crap back to the dog's owner, put it in their mailbox, or even put it in a burning bag in a safe manner (supervise it so it won't burn anything else) so that the owner stomps out the tiny fire and steps in the crap in the process. 2. Don't target anyone in matters where it is just a matter of preference or free will. For instance, if someone won't date you, that is their right. 3. Only get it while it is "cold." If you act in the moment, you could get in trouble. 4. There needs to be a lesson. 5. Try to keep it fun. 6. Keep the "punishment" on par with the "crime." Don't be like the guy who brought a gun to a popcorn fight. 7. Never steal from your opponent. If you have access to their accounts, then make sure any products ordered go only to them. So they can return anything that is sent to them. If you go beyond that, that would be considered fraud.

The machine at the pharmacy.
A guy asked a pharmacist about his elbow pain. The pharmacist said it was probably "tennis elbow" and to soak it daily for a couple of weeks in warm Epsom-salt water. But the pharmacist said there was a machine that he could deposit $20 and a urine sample. So he tried the machine, and it reached the same conclusion as the pharmacist. So he decided to try to fool the machine. He went home and scooped some water out of the toilet where his wife and daughter had both peed without flushing, dropped a dog turd in it, and jacked off in it for good measure, and put that in the machine with his payment. The machine gave this report: 1. Your water is hard, get a water softener. 2. Your wife is pregnant. You are not the father. Hire an attorney. 3. Your daughter is hooked on drugs. Enroll her in rehab. 4. Your dog has worms. Take it to the veterinarian for a dewormer. 5. Continue soaking your arm in an Epsom salt solution. Your tennis elbow won't get better if you keep masturbating.

What can be done about intrusive memories?
Around age 3-4, I suffered a bad fall and received permanent brain injury to the right prefrontal cortex. Because of that, I struggled with life-long temper problems, slowness at certain tasks, poor social abilities, intrusive memories of things that would be insignificant to most, unwanted revenge fantasies, teasing, scapegoating, and being patronized for no reason by others. I just want the nightmare to stop. I've tried many things to overcome the unwanted memories, the temper (intermittent explosive disorder), and help aversion. I've tried prayer, OTC drugs, nutritional support, Rx drugs (with and without a prescription), and even UTC ("under the counter") drugs. I've tried meditation, the occult, Body Code, EFT/"tapping," talk therapy, and so on. About any conventions solution, I've tried, and even things that are not so conventional. There are things that seemed to help but stopped working or caused other problems. High caffeine actually helped, but then I saw early signs of psychosis and stopped cold turkey, taking years to get symptoms back to where they were no worse than when starting. (The rebound effect is always a bitch.) For 3 weeks, nicotine greatly reduced the intrusive memories. You can probably guess the 2 things that happened. The intrusive memories reached the point of returning to pretreatment levels while treating with nicotine. And you can likely guess the other problem (which I'm still trying to fight), and that's addiction. Another consideration is that since the problem is only the right front part of the brain, there is no way to ingest any substance that only targets that area. So that means that an electrical, surgical, or other direct intervention would be more appropriate. There are only a few things I haven't tried, mostly because I cannot access them due to money or necessary connections, or because it isn't approved by the FDA. Here are some of what I haven't tried: 1\. TDCS (transcranial direct current stimulation). For that, I just haven't gotten around to trying it. I could build one of these devices (just a 9v battery and electrodes, right?) or buy something that is likely to be safer. I don't know if this would be strong enough or targeted enough. 2\. TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation). That is a fairly non-invasive procedure that involves using strong magnetism to shape brainwaves. It is only approved for a few conditions such as depression. I am fairly certain it is done in my state. But I don't know how to approach anyone about this since I would need it for off-label use. 3\. DBS (direct brain stimulation). That is where electrodes are implanted into the brain and wires are routed to a device in the chest cavity. Epilepsy is currently the only approved use. One guy managed to get it for OCD, but he went through a whole bunch of red tape to get it. 4\. Stem cell research. The PFC has no active stem cells in adult brains, and stem cell research on the brain has a long way to go. 5\. Advanced medication research. If you mix 3-5 research chemicals together, you can supposedly turn certain non-neuronal brain cells into active neurons. I'd be willing to try this one. 6\. Other brain stimulation such as ultrasound. That has been shown to cause at least a half-hour of calm in test subjects. I don't know if there would be a way to keep applying this to make the results more lasting. 7\. Brain surgery such as an amygdalectomy. That is not an optimal approach and is bad for causing collateral damage. Epilepsy is about the only approved usage, though it was once tried for mental health issues and abandoned since it caused more damage than good. It only had modest to moderate effects in those who were already assumed to need lifelong inpatient care. The goal was more to make patients more manageable and not really to cure them. Some of the reasons it was tried for had better solutions 2/3 of those. This was tried with an intellectually handicapped woman who couldn't stop masturbating -- hell, even a straight jacket would be more humane and ethical for that, and she continued her extreme masturbation after her treatment. However, it did help a gay rapist living in that same facility. He stopped all sexual violence after the procedure. One man with severe OCD did inadvertently perform a left amygdalectomy on himself with a pistol, but his intention was suicide. After this failed suicide attempt, he was able to make friends and hold down a job, things he was unable to do before his suicide attempt.

What can I do about forced, unwanted help?
My entire life, I've been robbed of opportunities to get to prove myself, show how smart I am, and earn the respect of being allowed to struggle, take risks, do things the hardest way possible to have the chance to prove to others how capable I am. That way, if I had such a chance, others could see what I can do and respect me enough to not assume I need help. Now, before we go further, I am not against people helping others when they actually want it and need it. As an analogy, let's consider rape. Most people oppose rape, but they don't oppose consensual sex. (There wouldn't be anyone here if they took it that far.) And to be clear, I'm not equating unwanted help with rape. I've yet to hear of someone breaking into someone's house at 3 AM, beating them up, forcibly doing the dishes, and vacuuming the house. Many might benefit from this, but there would be a right way to arrange a housecleaning. I don't oppose help under the following circumstances: 1. As a matter of common courtesy in situations where this is reasonable. For instance, I won't get bent out of shape if someone were to hold a door for me, at least if I'm within 20-30 feet of the door. Now if someone did it for me over 50 feet away, I'd feel creeped out. 2. Gifts at appropriate times such as holidays, birthdays, and special occasions. 3. When helping minor children if their parents or other authority figures are not there. 4. When help is provided by someone licensed/credentialed to do so. 5. If it is a bonafide emergency. So if I'm drowning, trapped in a vehicle, or trapped in a fire, I'd gladly appreciate whatever help they provide. If I'm conscious, I'd be soliciting the help. If not, I wouldn't be threatening a lawsuit when I come to. 5. If the help is minor or impersonal. If you pick up trash out of my yard, sweep my porch, or knock down some cobwebs, I am not going to bless you out over that. 6. Defending my property in my absence. That is just being a good neighbor. 7. Defending one's honor in their absence, provided it doesn't start rumors or reinforce stereotypes. If you see someone living as a woman and you want to take up for them, then defend them as a woman, not as a gay man. And if you are uncomfortable, then say as little as possible. 8. When it is requested, at least to the extent it is requested. To me, it is important to not do any more for me than what I ask. You don't know my plans and don't need to know them. So since you don't know, it is best to help others to the extent requested. Now, I guess sales would be an exception since it would be your job to try to steer me to a more appropriate product. Now, it would be nice if you did try to steer me to a more appropriate product at your expense, but I don't expect that (since you'd make more money if you sell me more). I mean, it would be wise to sell me a cheaper item if I need it for a single-use task or if I am not aware of the alternatives. That is taking the slow approach and allowing me to trust you more so I'd be more interested in doing repeat business. For instance, I mentioned needing an oscilloscope on a forum and someone suggested that I get a signal analyzer instead. That would have been more appropriate, and more cost-effective. A logic analyzer would have more probes and be cheaper since I could capture the output to an existing computer and better leverage what I already have. *** Now, the problems I'd have with help outside the above that is done without prior consent are these: 1. If I planned on NOT being helped and took actions to prevent it. Like if I get somewhere last, it is because I timed things and set it up to where I'd get there last and get to be ignored while I do whatever I want. 2. If I am being rushed. If I get somewhere last, it is incredibly easy to ignore me and let me go last. If you can go around me, then just go around me without wasting my time by making it personal. I don't need your permission to go. 3. If it is because you disrespect me, think I'm stupid, or want to assert power or mastery over me. Just treat me as an equal adult who doesn't need help. If I miss out or harm myself in the process, that is MY concern. We need to stop coddling people and treating everyone like they are fragile. 4. If you ruin my plans. My plans are nobody's business, and the best way to not ruin anyone's plans is to do the least amount for them possible. You can always do more, but you can't always do less. If you back up for or move for someone trying to go last, you cannot later un-insult them or give them the first opportunity they had back. No, you'd have to do more unwanted help to make things back to how they were. I mean, backing up for me for no reason and pulling back up is not the same as ignoring me the first time. 5. If you prevent me from using whatever special abilities I might have. You don't know what they are, so it is important to keep all of my options open. If I have an uncanny ability for being mature, waiting my turn, and going last because I got there last, then don't patronize me by backing up. If you don't know, then mind your own business. 6. If you single me out or treat me differently from others to the extent I've earned. If you are allowing others to take a break and go around them without rushing them or trying to force them to go, then don't do it for me. If I am riding a bicycle, then don't treat me differently from other drivers by backing up or doing anything for me that you don't do for them. If you don't back up for cars on the main path that are properly centered, then don't make any special cases for a cyclist who is properly centered in the same lane. Either back up for both or stay pulled up for both. *** So I'm trying to find out how to correctly advertise to strangers by my behavior itself that I am intelligent enough to not need help. I need others to see that I'm a geek, that I'm a nerd, that I'm independent, that I am smart enough to plan ahead. If I am demonstrating that I'm patient and mature enough to wait my turn and go last because I got there last, I need for others to honor that by changing nothing for me. So in some cases, I deliberately act differently from others to earn something better than how someone would treat commoners. When I was in the 3rd grade, an assistant teacher would fondle the hair of kids on the way out. So I'd duck to prevent this since I saw this as a mastery/ownership/patronizing behavior and didn't want it. And even though I ducked, they did it to me anyway. I felt I was more mature than the other kids and wasn't going to stand for being condescended to this way or treated like I was property.

SOC Therapy
Sexual orientation change therapy was once called reparative therapy and it is quite controversial. In fact, most organizations for such change have been shut down, and most books on the topic have been removed. Now, my opinion is that homosexuality has multiple etiologies. Some might actually be born that way, but I see no definitive proof. Most of the theories about how it may be inborn are only partial. For instance, there is one gene that was thought to be a gay gene. However, it turned out to be a self-determination gene. It didn't make anyone gay but made it easier to do unpopular things. So gay folks with that gene would be more likely to make it to adulthood and less likely to harm themselves. Even if some are born that way, that doesn't mean that all are or that others cannot be helped. I see SOC therapy as a human right. If you have unwanted SSAs (same-sex attractions), then you should have the right to get rid of them. That is no difference really than seeking sex reassignment. That isn't really popular either, but if a person can choose to get their genitals inverted they should have the right to get rid of unwanted same-sex attractions. While I get it that some want power and see folks leaving the lifestyle (for lack of a better word, and I don't mean to be insensitive) as a weakness or vulnerability to their position. By allowing those who want to change to change, it doesn't mean that the rest must do so or that should be used as an excuse to bully them into changing. There are many myths that opponents spread about SOC therapy. For instance, contrary to popular belief, SOC therapy is not all that different from "Acceptance and Affirmation Therapy." It all starts with acceptance and support regardless of whether you want to change or embrace your orientation. Very few movements to change sexual orientation were cruel or engaged in culture; that was a fringe thing, and most of that were myths made up by the opponents. "Corrective rapes" have no place in this and only reinforce the existing orientation. That has been done more in other nations than here. Electroshock and forced pornography viewing have no place either. Most SOC therapy is no different from therapy for anything else. If one wants to change, it needs to be because they want to and not because of perceived advantage. If you are afraid of Hell, take that up with God and get salvation. And if you still want to tackle sexual orientation, then do so without this burden. Now, if you have family pressure or threats of being disowned, that is their problem, not yours, and being disowned can work both ways. If your family doesn't have your back, then you can't lose what you never really had. There was a guy who thought he was gay but probably wasn't. His therapist gave him materials that challenged his religious beliefs, help his self-esteem, and helped him to be more assertive. Then for maybe a year, he went on dates with guys. Then it reached a point where sex with other men just seemed to bore him. So, unsure of what to try to recapture the feelings that gay sex gave him, he figured he'd try dating women. He found a girlfriend, and while they eventually broke up, he felt things with her that he never felt with any of the guys. So he found another girlfriend and they married not too long after, and they were married for at least 5 years, and likely more, though nobody tracked them after that. That shows that while he was given Acceptance and Affirmation Therapy, it still had the results of SOC Therapy, even if he was never really gay. There are some theories that seem to be outdated but which I think are relevant. There was once the notion of primary vs. secondary homosexuality. Primary homosexuality is when someone outwardly manifests it from an early age. Secondary or latent homosexuality is when someone fights it most of their life and then comes out later in life. One theory about the difference here is when children are forced to choose one parent over the other. So a primary homosexual would side with the other-sex parent while the secondary homosexual would side with the same-sex parent. For instance, let's say there are 2 gay boys and their parents divorce each other. One sides with his mother and is obviously gay early on. The other boy sides with his father, and maybe also bullies his brother and engages in gay-bashing. Then hating the feminine and hating gays catches up with him and he comes out of the closet. So in this case, while the early life trauma of divorce affects the subtype of gayness involved, it might not necessarily be enough to cause homosexuality itself. In some cases, the cause could be due to an early violation of the soul. Or it could be in combination with a trauma such as exposure to divorce, and then some pedophile notices the vulnerability and causes further damage. And such pain needs to be dealt with, even if they choose to embrace their gayness. Now, if you really want to change, you might need professional therapy, but you might have to hide the reason for therapy. So work on other things such as assertiveness, self-esteem, or any early-life trauma, but not trust the therapist with the gay thing, unless of course you want to remain gay.

Life Coaching
Part of me wants to be a life coach. Of course, I need more inner work myself, and I'd need a curriculum to coach from. This is a passion of mine, and I think I am good at it and have insights that many are missing. While looking for materials to use, I stumbled across a site for people who have cognitive or perceptual issues, such as courses on how to solve problems. So the exercises would be good for those with schizophrenia, dementia, or developmental delays. One exercise stands out. The exercise was to make a list of 20-30 ways to get a cat out of a tree. Folk may include things such as climbing the tree, calling the fire department, putting out some food for the cat to draw them out, calling their name, etc. Some might come up with extreme answers such as chopping down the tree, burning the tree, or shooting the cat out of the tree. However, there is one good answer that most people leave off the list. Do nothing at all. The cat will figure out how to get down when it is ready, assuming they are not already injured or dead.

Therapy, memory reconsolidation, and development
The problem with a lot of therapy is that you focus on the wrong things. You bring two frames of mind to a therapy session. First, you bring the anti-symptom position. You have a reason you see the therapist. That is where folks tend to get stuck since you don't need therapy for your decision to get therapy. You know something isn't working and it is rational to seek help for it. However, the part that needs work is the pro-symptom position. What is making you want to stay ill? That is the real question for therapy, and discussing for hours how the problem is ruining your life doesn't help. So a good therapist would make you see what you don't want to see about yourself and face that. Sitting and griping about the problem doesn't help. In the above, another facet to this is how to bring about change. If your problem is ignorance or a bad technique, then talk therapy would help you. If it is a problem related to everyday learning, then having someone to teach you what to do instead would help. However, most problems you bring to therapy are not this type of problem. No, it is more about preprogrammed emotional reactions that are stored in a different part of the brain. Adding more to it doesn't help. Instead, you need to contradict what is there, and you often don't consciously know what that is. So you need to get to the emotional truth of things that often isn't true, but what you believe is true. That usually needs to be revealed and accepted. Memory reconsolidation is a mechanism in the brain that can allow you to change the meaning of the emotional truth. For traumatic issues, you can't just forget what happened, nor is that even what is needed. Forgetting the autobiographical event won't take the underlying pain away. So you'd need to find out how the emotional truth is contradicting the objective truth. Then when you can highlight the discrepancy, you can then restore full moral agency and become aware of your choices. The problem is choosing things you don't know you are choosing, or why. For an example of emotional truth, a woman suffered panic attacks. Obviously, she didn't want those (anti-symptom position). With therapy, she learned that she had superstitious beliefs as her emotional truth. Somewhere, she picked up the notion that everyone comes to the world with a suffering quota, and as long as you accept your lot of suffering, then bad things wouldn't happen to others. She operated on those principles and didn't even know it. So the therapist wrote her beliefs on index cards and had her read them multiple times a day for the next couple of weeks. So when this mechanism was triggered, she became aware of it and could then choose differently. Another example was a lesbian who broke up with her partner. She became a bit obsessive, though not bad enough to become a stalker. The emotional truth that she buried was that at some level, she wanted to be her ex. So becoming aware of that allowed her to become more indifferent to the breakup and not feel as if a part of her was taken away from her. Letting go of that, she could resume living her life. That seems to be an element of a lot of homosexuality, IMHO, that they don't like themselves that much and look for partners who have aspects that they want for themselves. Tobacco companies use a bit of this aspect to help get people addicted. The more popular brands tend to have an associated "image" or way to be attached to it. For instance, take Marlboro. What do you associate with that brand? Maybe you associate strength and rugged individuality with the product, and you want those qualities in yourself. So you use the product since you don't see them as selling you cancer, heart disease, and early death, you see them as selling you things such as strength, independence, rugged individuality, acceptance, and other things. And I think homosexuality offers a lot of the same things. This ties in with my feelings about emotional maturity. The idea for marriage or a relationship is to be challenged and exercise the sense of self you already have. So I see turning to a partner to work out what you should have learned very early in life as a misuse of relationships. You bring a certain level of an emotional foundation with your into the relationship, and you build upon that, not construct that from scratch. The Bible says that a "man" is to leave his parents and cleave to his wife. That is the problem here, folks who lack the foundation you learn growing up, and missing that, they seek it in partners. Even similar can be said about bullying. You don't go to school to learn an emotional foundation or a sense of self. You need a certain amount of that first. So if you have that foundation, then having it challenged will make it stronger. But if you lack one, then having it challenged can actually stunt emotional growth. Thus that ties in with the above where folks are broken to the point of seeking partners to validate them rather than challenge them. Now, there are a number of techniques for discovering your emotional truth. A common one is chain analysis where you keep asking questions until you get to the root of the issue. For instance, what if a parent gets bent out of shape over how orderly their child keeps their room? They could ask why that's so important or what's wrong with that. They may say that others might see their child's room. Why might that matter? As they keep asking and getting deeper, they may reach a point where they can't go any deeper. "I want the other parents to like me and see me as a fit parent." And they might recall how that was challenged or recall something their parents did. So while the kid should likely keep a tidy room, that isn't really the issue here and has nothing to do with the parents' feelings. When confronting one's emotional truth, it's not even necessary to relive the underlying trauma. What is more important are the improper lessons learned that seem to have stunted one's emotional development. If you can bring those to the surface and set up experiences to challenge such beliefs, then you can move past those. Repressing things, judging yourself, or trying to convince yourself that things aren't true does not help. Of course, you cannot harness memory reconsolidation in every instance. If you have a deeply seated fear of driving because you fear the car will explode at some point, well, thinking about all the times the car didn't explode will not address such a fear. I forgot what you'd do in that case.